C hapter VII
My Way into Spirituality
Sleipnir - Message From Heaven
The 'way is not in heaven, it is in the heart
My second trip to Buffalo was planned with Lily Dale this time. I had a full twelve months to think about this and I wanted to know it myself what it was that made Lily Dale for what it is now. My sister was supposed to be with me, we were looking for a day out. The visit was out of season and not every medium was working in the Village. We enjoyed the long way to Lily Dale, the area is very beautiful, drove through rolling hills. Here and there a small lake, a village and wine distilleries, so much wine growing. So we decided to use another day for a tour of the various wineries.
In the village of Lily Dale I realized that this is not the known America. Here time had stopped. We strolled for a while through the small alleys, left and right the mostly Victorian-style houses, all painted in a soft pastel tone. I could imagine how it would bloom here in the spring. We searched for information that could provide us with a medium. When we found one, I sat there and had not the slightest idea what could come and listened attentively.
There I sat with Sheila who advised me to say yes or no and my name, everything else was not useful. What did I know, I always like to talk, what is useful and what is not. So I sat in my chair and listened to what Sheila would tell me. I had absolutely no idea what to expect and relaxed for this session.
For an ignorant person, it is difficult to believe in what comes next. You carry the name of your grandmother. Yes? Who doesn’t my age? Then she described my grandma, that wasn’t already impressive. A lot of information came, I repressed it. Then she said something for the future that would change my life. 'When the Easter flowers bloom, your life will turn 180 degrees,' she said - no more and no less could I get out of her. What should I think about it? I let it go, forgot about it and headed home with my family.
On the plane on the way to Germany my sweet husband did exactly what he always liked to do, he lost himself in the newspaper. At some point he stopped and showed me the ads ‘Looking for a running restaurant’. I protested, 'You know how difficult it is to find a new solvent tenant at this time'. 'You are selling, or I am canceling my friendship,' he replied. These were tough words.
At the castle, everyday life in the restaurant immediately started again. The work had to be resumed, calls came in and reservations where made. I answered one call and asked, 'what can I do for you?'. 'Mrs. Sjövall, if you have time tomorrow, I would like to introduce you to our new sales representative,' said my beer supplier. We made an appointment for the next day.
There we all sat at the round table, talked our trip to New York and the new colleague was introduced. At the end, he asked, 'Can I do something for you?' He meant coasters or glasses, but I knew that if I did not say anything at this point, I would make Tom angry. I took a heart and heard myself say 'you can find me a new tenant'. That was a bombshell that struck 'you want to sell?', 'No,' I said, 'I have to, my husband does not want me to do this any longer'.
Three days later my restaurant was sold, three months later I handed over the key to the new owners.
Then the last day came, Easter was coming, the new tenants needed time to prepare for the Easter business. When finally we handed over the key from the restaurant, we took a look back in the castle courtyard, before we drove home. At the condo I opened the blinds and I still see remember what my eyes saw - the whole garden in Bremerhaven was in bloom with Easter flowers, daffodils, pearl flowers ... it could not have been more clear. Tom and I stood by the window, holding hands, looking outside. The big question was: How do they do that? How could she this from the future?
My Way to Spirituality
Once you go the way of spirituality, then there is no left or right only a straight ahead. During my search, small stories have happened to me over and over again, which continued to drive my way forward.
Many times on the highway I was ready to turn around and put the whole thing in the bin. And then there was always something that made me laugh. I drive on the highway towards the seminar and think; Return, what are you doing? On the radio, the answer: Hold on tight to your dreams .... another time I catch myself while driving with the thoughts in the parallel world, I imagine what it would be like if I broke off everything. When coming back to myself, I'm already on the turnoff to Essen .. doesn’t pay to go back, then go on ... Ever since I learned, Heaven is funny. The souls make sure that you can fulfill your life plan.
The refusal to spirituality runs like a red line through my life. When I was fourteen, I finally decided never to pay attention to this part of me.
That worked fine until my husband, friend, and buddy Tom said goodbye to me after fifty years, saying, 'If you're right and there is eternal life, then I'll send you Sleipnir'. 'Sleipnir?' I asked, 'I've only ever seen four-legged horses out in the world, where do you want to summon an eight-legged monster.' 'Let that be my concern,' Tom answered, and shortly thereafter he fell into a coma.
Today I know that in mourning the mourner is sensitive, I thought I was schizophrenic. In retrospect, the spirit world began to work on me, trying again and again to attract attention, I looked away.
One of my first exercises during the meditation time was the mindfulness exercise, mindful of me, and mindful of everything around me. Whether it is during the day or while sleeping at night, sounds funny? In your dreams our loved ones can reach us. Suddenly I realized I could not escape I needed to do what had to be done. First day in Seminar we were asked 'why are you here?' My answer from the bottom of my heart was: Many of my clients have a problem with the death; I think I will help them. As I write these lines, I hear the inner voice saying - go ahead!
Sleipnir – Message From Heaven
I paint only when I have problems, those that cannot be solved at once. Then I go to the cupboard and pick colors randomly from the shelf. Add to that the canvas and I go, mostly on my kitchen table. No concept, no idea of what I want to paint, I just start. Paint a background and let it dry. Then I go away, drink something and try to get away. Back on the screen, the confused painting becomes something I did not think possible before.
My pictures are my lifeblood. They show from the depth of my soul the current state just such. And so one day I sat down at the kitchen table and painted Sleipnir. While I was taking this picture, I talked to Tom: 'If you do not answer, then I paint it myself'. Thought even: 'Self is the woman' and was pleased with the result. Three colors were important to me. White and Black - Alpha and Omega, beginning and end, and red for the dynamic that has played a big role in our lives. It's not so easy for a newcomer to send a horse that has eight legs. And that was the end of it for me.
In training, I got used to a daily meditation ritual. At the same time lowering in my chair in practice was a natural ritual. That day was a little different; I lay down on my sofa overlooking the window. Coming from meditation, I do not know what brought me back, I looked out. There was the greeting! But that took a while, my dear. Or how to say honey: What took you so long? Where is my camera? I could not find her that fast enough. There he was, in the sky, the greeting of my darling, Sleipnir in its most beautiful form and I was looking for the camera. It took a while before I could photograph it because the formation started to dissipate